10/19/2005

Small things matter - less

My friend was telling me about this guy that she's been dating. They've had about 6 dates and the other night, she invited him to come up to her place....so they could talk. So anyway, they're talking, and things are getting pretty hot and heavy. He's running his hands up her bare back, she's trying to press herself up against him to feel if he's, well...hard. First of all, it seems you would be able to tell right away if the guy you have your body pressed up against is hard, right? No. She tells me that she's starting to worry that he's not really into her. He seems into her, after all he has his hands all over her breasts. She decides to undo his belt, he lets her. She runs her hands up his stomach and plays with his chest hair. She's really just stalling until the moment she can shove her hand down his pants and check out his 'goods'. Finally, she thinks she's provided enough cover so she slides her hand in his boxers. She feels around. Um, where'd it go? She panics. Hand sliding around, go a little deeper, oh, there's a lump. Yes that's how she described it, a lump. It's semi hard...you know...a chubby. Ok, maybe she just needs to play with it a little and it will 'grow'. So she starts playing, gently at first, then she's getting frustrated so she tugs a little harder. Nothing is happening. In the mean time he's moaning and she can tell he's really turned on - except his willy doesn't appear to share his sentiment. He tells her they should 'retire' to the bedroom. At this point she's a bit skeptical. She likes the guy, has a good time with him, but she likes sex and she's not sure sex with this guy will be worth the effort. She gives him the benefit of the doubt and takes his hand and guides him into the bedroom. He tells her he likes to have the lights on...Uh Oh, she's actually afraid of what she'll see - or won't see. She flips the bathroom light on so it casts a faint glow over the bedroom but doesn't light it up like the 4th of July. He starts to take her clothes off, tosses her panties over the easy chair in her room. She starts to undress him, his pants drop to the floor, she tosses his shirt to the side. Ok, all that's left are those boxers he has on. She plays a little more, procrastinating. They are laying on top of the bed, he has his legs intertwined with his, she thinks to herself, maybe they should just cuddle. Oh please, this girl likes cuddling like a fish likes being out of water. There's a lot of heavy breathing, he's excited - she thinks. Finally he removes his boxers then takes her hand and places it - where his c*ck is supposed to be. Yeah that's what I said, he places it where his willy is supposed to be. She feels his 'lump', his chubby, and she starts to freak a little. She wants to look at it, just to be sure. Ok, open eyes slowly, carefully...OH MY GOD. There it is, all 3 inches of it, and that's while it's hard. What sort of cruel trick has been played on this guy. He's gorgeous, he successful, he's nice. Why oh why is this happening to her. She's trying to figure out how to get out of having sex with him. She really has no desire to lay there and pretend it feels good to be poked with....that. He's kissing her, she starts to pull away. He asks what's wrong. She tells him she's just not sure they should continue. She tells him she's really into him and sex changes everything. Yeah, it changes everything when it sucks. He holds her, she can't really tell if he's lost his chubby, it wasn't that chubby to begin with. After about ten minutes he tells her they can wait, he likes her so he'll wait. Damn, she's starting to feel really guilty, really shallow, really RELIEVED. They get dressed, a few hugs and kisses are exchanged, he leaves.

So she's there, talking to me, explaining her dilemma. She wants to know what to do. Should she try and get over her fear of 'small things', or should she just be honest and tell him she likes to be poked - but she also likes to 'feel' what's poking her. I'm not sure what to say to her, after all I'm shallow, I'd dump him, I have a man with a big 'poker'. It's like this, c*cks are like diamond rings, once you've had a really big one, you just can't settle for a cheap imitation. Fact.

18 Comments:

  1. NewYorkMoments said...
    Oh God...I'm sure you've read my stories about my ex-boyfriend of 3 years, "Mr. 3.5 Inches."

    It just wasn't enough. But, then again...He was also a total asshat & he sucked in bed (not just because it was too small. Maybe it wouldn't have mattered as much if he were a great guy & put forth effort in the sac. But I'll never know.

    I feel her pain. I really, really do.
    Sky said...
    Oh I have mixed feelings on this. I like sex just as much as anyone and yes size does matter to a point. Now, I don't want it so large that it is coming out the other end but it's nice to be able to feel something. However, I was with someone once. I will call him highlighter man. Girls, get those Sanford Accent Highlighters out. Got it out? Ok, well CA man or better known as highlighter man (and I am being generous) is one of the few men that has actually been able to make me cum with just intercourse. Now, his size was the girth of the highlighter but a bit shorter so that should tell you something. I thought I was going to break it!!!! Would you believe he dumped me because I didn't meet his standards?

    I prefer someone that is a bit more endowed than that but I wouldn't throw away something good because he isn't "packing". It's hard enough to find decent guys without adding additional criteria to what is acceptable.
    Kelly said...
    I think it depends on what your friend's goal is. If she wants a real relationship, I would give it a chance. Size doesn't tell everything if he is actually good in bed. If she just wants a big c*ck, well, time to move on. If she's had 6 dates with this guy and hasn't slept with him yet it seems more like the former.
    k o w said...
    I'd tell her to give it a shot.
    WDKY said...
    I'm not sure that she couldn't have handled that (pun intended) slightly differently. If that's what he's up against no wonder he can't get an erection.
    it's all about me said...
    Ouch. Or maybe not, in this case.

    But you never know, she should try him out - his talents could lie in other areas... it shouldn't all be about penetration, right?
    Caterpillar said...
    Oh that just sucks! Because really, in my opinion three inches cannot be satisfying. Average can be wonderful, but three inches is far below average. And if sex is important to her, which it sounds like it is, she may not be able to get turned on by him or get past the chubby.

    But I can see the other side, too, if he's great in all other ways. I just don't know if I could personally get past that TINY issue though.
    WDKY said...
    I think it's a real problem for him, Cat. I just don't think that getting out of bed and showing him the door is the way to go.
    Tracy said...
    Well, I'd say I feel sorry for the guy, although he seems to be comfortable with it - and good for him! - and be empathetic that your friend has to choose between some unpleasant options. Further, I'd say you're a incredibly shallow twat who apparently believes, misguidedly I might add, that she's someone who deserves a partner with a big 'poker'. Based on your reaction to the subject, I'm guessing your partner would have to have a big 'poker' to fill the hollow canyon between your legs, as well as your ears. Good luck to you when he finally decides to give his big poker to someone more deserving.
    TJ said...
    well,don't sugarcoat things tracy--tell us how you really feel...
    Mr. H.K. said...
    If it's less than 8... Run!

    Cheers,

    Mr. H.K.
    Postcards from Hell's Kitchen
    And I Quote Blog
    lighterate said...
    I'm not disputing some length is required, but if it's a choice between, say, 8 and 10 inches, wouldn't most girls take the eight and add the other two to the width.

    'A long dick is never going to rub my clit,' a girl, with a great sense of poetry, once told me.
    ~The Goofy Ass Chick said...
    At least she handled it without laughing.... I know a girl who made the horrible mistake of doing that once and shattered a man's ego beyond repair.

    Like someone else said, if she really likes the guy it can be overcome. It all depends on what she's wanting from the relationship. If he's truly a decent good man than it's worth it. Good men are harder to come by than good dicks.
    ange said...
    its up to her. But sex does play a big roll in our lives. if shes not going to get pleasure and he does, its not going to work. it cant be aone way street. maybe if she really likes him they are better off as friends.Or give it a go, he just may have tricks up his sleeve. But from personal experience, "size does matter."
    k said...
    I'm in total agreement with you...
    " c*cks are like diamond rings, once you've had a really big one, you just can't settle for a cheap imitation. Fact." Though you should add that you can't settle for a cheap imitation "for long"...

    Good sex is only one teensy aspect of a good relationship. The brain happens to be the largest sex organ I'm aware of, there's nothing sexier than someone who can make my mind work overtime....
    unforgiving b*tch said...
    Maybe she should just try it...and if the sex is bad then....heck, I don't know.

    Maybe he's one of those guys who you have to be in love with in order to have sex with. Because then the small things don't matter because you're in love...

    I can't even convince myself of this one.
    Mister Hand said...
    I just want to say that the wholly uncalled-for bitterness in tracy's comment leads me to believe that she has learned to settle for a guy with a very, very small cock. He probably makes good money.

    I suppose there's a chance that tracy could be a man. In that case...

    ...well, you can see where I'm going to go with that from a mile away.

    The problem is this: if you continue a relationship with a man with a small cock, then you are likely to breed more small-cocked men and make life all the harder for future generations of women. So don't be ashamed to eschew the small cock. You're doing your part to ensure the success of the species.

    Ever seen a dog with a small red rocket? Hell no! Chihuaua's got more than this guy had goin' for him. Why? Because dey bitches don't set for no downsize on the red willie.

    You ladies have an obligation to ensure a large-cock future for all of humankind. Don't shirk your responsibilities.

    And tracy: have an affair with someone with a big dick so you can stop being so bitter.
    Yes, I'm a Sinner said...
    Uhm... yeah how's his tongue action?

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